Self improvement, it’s literally the core and yet bane of everyone’s existence. Everyone wants to live each day being a better them than they were the day before, and yet most people don’t find pleasure in the work and time it takes to really get to levels of noticeable improvement – be it physically, financially, mentally or any other way. I myself find myself at times to be frustrated with my own journeys, I’ve honestly been something of a fat vapid blob for most of my life so it’s nice being able to mold myself like clay, but like I said at times it’s frustrating.
When you’re fighting an uphill battle with your own state of being, it tends to put a mental strain on you. The way society is these days, people are focused on instant gratification, myself included. If you put in work to do something and don’t immediately see or feel noticeable results, it seems like you just wasted your time. This can lead people to become discouraged and lose motivation to continue things like exercise or long-term projects they’ve been working on, all because they’ve become so focused on things that react to change right in front of their eyes.
What people have to understand is that when it comes to anything good in life, it takes time. If you want to become rich/wealthy and financially stable, it takes time and effort and you have to be ready to learn. If you want to become physically fit, you have to suffer the pain and strain of strenuous exercise before you see results (unless you want to do it the tortoise way and do light exercise for a year and a half before seeing them). If you want to be healthy you have to adjust your eating habits, your living habits, and a few other things before you really feel the difference. If you want to become better at a certain sport or activity, you have to commit yourself to practicing (preferably for at least an hour) getter good at it.
There are exceptions but I’m not talking about the .001% of people born into wealth or who are just naturally physically fit, they likely will never find or need this blog anyway. I’m talking to the regular people who feel like all the advice and suggestions they see online need to be followed to a T and they’ll be who they want to be. That’s just good marketing from the self improvement community, think of it as “flat tummy tea” for the mind. In the end there is no “get rich/get fit/get healthy/love life quick” scheme that is good for you. Somewhere along the way you’ll be sacrificing a critical part of your wellbeing or your identity trying to follow along with all the advice you see.
Why? Because you aren’t them. You can’t feel, perceive, or think what they do, nor can you be who they are. You are you. At the end of the day no matter how amazing someone else makes their life seem, how cool it would be to live like them and be able to do what they did they had to work to get there, and above all they took their own path and weren’t following the footsteps in someone else’s trenches. You’ll force yourself into bad habits and frames of mind trying to be someone you aren’t and failing miserably at it.
I wrote about this in my last article, no matter how much you set yourself up to try to be like or emulate others it wont work. You have your own mind and you need to put emphasis on your strengths while working to minimize if not reduce entirely your weaknesses. A lot of self improvement will tell you “If you just do x y and z you’ll find your way to an incredible hulk body and financial freedom today!” and in all actuality they’re living paycheck to internet paycheck. Just cuz your favorite blogger makes spending 6 hours in the gym a day or quitting their job and living out of coffee shops and airbnb rooms look cool doesn’t mean it’s for you. A lot of what you see on the internet is not what it appears to be, and I advise you start taking some of the things you see in the self improvement community with a grain of salt, especially if they promote it as a “SUREFIRE 100% FOOLPROOF METHOD”.
When it comes to the self improvement community i’m a nobody, who knows nothing and I readily admit it. However I have no qualms about talking about what I know and how I feel so others can have the opportunity to use it, however I don’t’ purport anything to be a guaranteed method of getting better. No one has one of those, however the first step in getting anything out of any of this type of advice is learning that none of your results will come quick and if that’s the reason that you can’t stay motivated or focused then get that through your head. The quicker you do, the quicker you start focusing on actual progress and not perceived progress.